Jersey Shore

I have to admit my current guilty pleasure is non other than MTV's own Jersey Shore. I've been disappointed with MTV as a network for a few years now but they've recently struck on mountain of gold with this show. I stopped watching the Real World years ago and I refuse to re-enter that World of retardation. I did like My Super Sweet 16 but it got way too obnoxious after a season. When the Shore hit the airwaves, I could care less about it but then my friends and family begged me to watch the show. After a few weeks of their demands and reading everybody's facebook updates and tweets, I finally caved in.

It was love at first site when I first watched this show. I've always kept the Garden State in a special place in my heart ever since I lost my virginity there in the summer of 1998. Then a year later The Sopranos hit the airwaves and I've pretty much been in a Jersey state of mind the past decade. Also, an honorable mention to Zach Braff's Garden State too although Natalie Portman overacted in it.

MTV grabbed the perfect cast of real-life guidos and ultra-trashy guidette bimbos. You couldn't have casted these characters with real actors. Yes, not even cast members of the Sopranos could do the trick. I can smell the hair gel and cheap nail polish coming from my TV screen. It's a true artistic achievement by gathering the NY-NJ metropolitan area's best cast of morons around. Watching this show compels me to bump my fist into the air while drinking water and eating ham. I'm amazed at how dumb they all are. I also love how they all eat dinner together and pray like a family yet have only known each other for a few days. There's no acting going on here. It's real.

Here's my breakdown of what I think of the whole cast:

-I just love DJ Pauly D. He's a true to the bone guido and if he ever came to DJ in Miami, I'd be there in a heartbeat. I also have to give him kuddos for jumping into that fight and laying down some good punches.

-I used to like Mike The Situation and I do appreciate his skills with the ladies but he seems too snake-like and would stab anybody in the back. He also has a creepy homo vibe to him too. It turns out he was once a male stripper which always creeps me out whenever guys do that shit (my gut feeling was right all long).

-I like Ronnie but he's too much of a loverboy. I do appreciate the fact that he's a true roidmonster and meathead. He's got the best nickname ever when that guy at the stand called him "Muscles Marinara." Another thing about him that I loved is how he just ate his own words: "Don't fall in love at the Jersey Shore" but ironically enough, he's head over heels for Sammy Sweetheart and he's missing out on all of the fun. Poor guy.

-I can't stand Vinny. He's too much of a pussy and seems like he lacks a personality.

-I find Snookie disgusting yet adorable all at the same time.

-Jenny JWOWW! is trashy hot when she's done up but looks awful in the morning. She seems like a nightmare to be around yet I like that fact that she can throw down when she's defending her homegirls.

-Angelina came and went too fast before I got to know her but I'm sure she's a pain in the ass and probably left for good reasons. Then again, she's a bartender and she was put on this Earth to do great things.

-Sammi Sweetheart seems like your typical nice Italian girl that lacks a brain and is cute yet a bit on the chunky side. The kind of girl you bring home to mom. I'm more than sure whoever dates her finds her to be a huge pain in the ass to date.